Navigating the School System: A Parent Guide

By Empower Behavior Coaching Parent Training Team 

Introduction 

Why does it have to be so hard to get appropriate services for our kids with special needs? 

Have you ever left an IEP meeting being told that it’s your responsibility to provide the services your child needs to be successful? In just the past three months, I’ve had three different families tell me this is exactly what they were told — by the school. 

I’ve walked out of meeting after meeting for my own kids thinking, “It’s time to homeschool,” because it feels like the school either isn’t trying or doesn’t truly care about what’s best. Too often, schools assume parents don’t understand their rights and will simply agree with whatever is presented. 

That assumption is wrong — and today, I want to help you understand why, and how to navigate an overly complicated school system with more confidence. 

Understanding the Law: Your Rights Under IDEA 

The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) is the federal law that protects students with disabilities. Under IDEA, schools are required to provide a Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE) to eligible students. 

What does that mean in real life? 

It means schools are legally responsible for identifying, evaluating, and supporting students with disabilities — and for providing the services and supports necessary for your child to access their education. 

This can include: 

• Special education services 

• Related services (speech, OT, counseling, etc.) 

• Accommodations and modifications 

• Paraprofessional or 1:1 support, when needed 

If a support is required for your child to access learning and the IEP team agrees it’s necessary, the school is responsible for providing it — not the parent. 

What Schools Are Required to Provide 

Based on IDEA: 

• Services must match your child’s needs, not what’s convenient for the school 

• If your child requires a paraprofessional or 1:1 support, the school must provide it 

• Any required support must be written into the IEP to be enforceable 

• Accommodations, modifications, and services must support meaningful access to learning 

• You are an equal member of the IEP team — your input matters 

You are not asking for favors. You are participating in a legal process designed to protect your child. 

How to Advocate for Your Child 

Here are practical, parent-centered ways to navigate the process more effectively: 

• Don’t “ask” — state needs clearly. Use direct, objective language about what your child needs and why. 

• Put everything in writing. Email requests, meeting summaries, and follow-ups. Save copies. 

• Use observable, objective descriptions. Example: “Needs 1:1 support during transitions for safety.” 

• Request data if services are denied. Schools must explain decisions and the data used to make them. 

• You don’t have to accept the first answer. “No” is not final if your child still lacks access to FAPE. 

• You don’t have to sign the IEP immediately. You are allowed time to review it outside the meeting. 

Important Things Schools May Not Tell You 

• Schools often offer the minimum unless parents request more 

• You have the right to an Independent Educational Evaluation (IEE) 

• You can pause or reschedule meetings if you feel rushed or pressured 

• You can request all data used to make educational decisions 

Knowledge shifts the power dynamic — and that’s a good thing. 

Why Advocacy Helps 

Advocacy isn’t about being difficult. It’s about ensuring decisions stay centered on your child’s needs. 

Advocates and informed parents: 

• Understand education law and procedures 

• Prepare effectively for meetings 

• Ask clearer questions 

• Help ensure services align with the child, not the system 

You are not a guest in this process — you are a decision-maker. 

When to Seek Professional Support 

There may be times when navigating the school system feels overwhelming or when you’re not sure how to push back appropriately. If you’ve tried advocating on your own and still feel stuck, additional support such as an advocate or educational lawyer can help. 

Final Encouragement 

The school system can feel intimidating — but knowledge and clear communication change everything. When you understand your rights and speak confidently about your child’s needs, you help ensure they receive the support they deserve. 

You are not asking for too much. You are advocating for access, dignity, and opportunity. 

Grab our free guide with tips and tricks for navigating the school system by clicking below.  

Grab Your Free Guide Here...