The Power of Reinforcement: How to Encourage Positive Behaviors at Home

By Empower Behavior Coaching Parent Training Team 

Introduction 

As parents, we often get caught up in correcting the behaviors we don’t want to see — and forget to notice when our children are doing something right. It’s easy to miss positive behaviors, especially when they’re quiet and calm compared to the louder, more challenging moments. Or maybe you just want to enjoy that rare calm without “jinxing it.” 

You’re not alone. As a mom of two children with their own diagnoses and challenges, I understand how chaotic life can feel. Today, I’ll share some simple ways to encourage positive behaviors at home using the power of positive reinforcement. 

What Is Positive Reinforcement? 

Positive reinforcement isn’t a new concept. It simply means providing a positive or desired consequence for behaviors we want to see more often. 

For example, if your child finishes dinner before getting dessert — and dessert is something they really enjoy — the likelihood of finishing dinner increases in the future. That’s reinforcement in action. 

Why Reinforcement Matters for Kids and Families 

• Creates structure and routine Setting clear expectations and consistent consequences helps children understand how their behavior leads to outcomes. This creates predictability and helps them feel secure. 

• Replaces problem behaviors with appropriate ones Reinforcement can help teach alternative, positive behaviors. For example, if your child tantrums to get what they want, you can teach them to ask appropriately or wait calmly — and reinforce that behavior instead. 

• Builds a calmer family environment When challenging behaviors decrease, parents can focus on positive moments and shared joy, creating a calmer home atmosphere for everyone. 

Practical Tips to Try at Home 

• Start small. Choose one behavior to focus on first. 

• Identify what motivates your child. Reinforcement can be as simple as praise, tickles, screen time, or playing outside. 

• Reinforce immediately and specifically. Tell your child exactly what they did well (“I love how you shared your toys!”). 

Common Mistakes or Myths 

Reinforcement is not bribery Bribery is a “payment” that happens before a behavior, while reinforcement comes after. We all experience reinforcement every day: 

• Calling a friend and getting to connect about your day 

• Going to work and receiving a paycheck 

• Cooking dinner and satisfying your hunger 

• Exercising and feeling stronger or seeing progress 

“Reinforcement isn’t working because behavior didn’t change right away.” Reinforcement takes time. Early on, behavior can even increase as your child adjusts to new expectations. Stay consistent — if you see improvement over time, reinforcement is working. 

When to Seek Professional Support 

There may be times when professional help is needed. If your child is engaging in behaviors that feel beyond your current knowledge, or if you’ve tried strategies that don’t seem to help, it may be time to seek additional coaching or support. 

Our team provides parent training and individualized coaching to help families reach their goals through practical, evidence-based strategies. 

Final Encouragement 

Remember, you are not alone! As parents, we are the primary change agents in our children’s success and independence. Some days will be challenging — but you can do this. 

Contact Empower Behavior Coaching to learn how our parent training program supports your family. 

Empower Behavior Coaching